Vegan MoFo Day 13: “Beet” by Radicchiohead

Today’s prompt is food song puns. I have to tell you up front: this is the worst thing I’ve ever done. With deep apologies to everyone who ever liked the song “Creep” by Radiohead, I present: “Beet.”

When you went to the store
Couldn’t look you in the eye
You’re just an omnivore
Your cart makes me cry
You float like a feather
Past the vegetable aisle
I wish you were vegan
You’re no fuckin’ vegan

I’m a beet
I’m arugula
What the kale am I doing here
I don’t dijon here

I don’t care what you eat
I want menu control
I want a perfect salad
I want a perfect bowl
I want you to notice
When veggies aren’t around
You’re no fuckin’ vegan
I wish you were vegan

But I’m a beet
I’m arugula
What the kale am I doing here
I don’t dijon here

She’s chopping up the greens
She’s chopping up
She chop, chop, chop, chop
Chop

Whatever makes you hungry
Whatever you want
You’re no fuckin’ vegan
I wish you were vegan
But I’m a beet
I’m arugula
What the kale am I doing here?
I don’t dijon here
I don’t dijon here